by Victor O Adebayo
The sudden announcement of the examination date left the campus in disarray. Lots of drama unfolded with appealing thematic preoccupation. Ridwan, the niggar raw grasping his book as if it was about to be snatched from him. Bolanle sitted under the tree with about 100 textbooks before her; was she preparing for Cambridge. Ojo running helter skelter to make photocopy of his notes. Jessica’s make-up was nowhere to be found. Cubes of sugar at various insect spots; sacrifice my foot. Kunle turned born again and was seen at the entrance of the church. Hammed was not left out with his long jalabia heading towards the mosque; praying seven times a day. Korede sweating profusely as there was still a lot to cover. John parading lecturers’ offices to beg for favour; it didn’t work this time around, Ayo chanting the anthem “Owo yi mapo”. Bayo constantly attending lectures; it’s late my friend. New faces in classes. Tutorials at every nook and cranny. Fuel scarcity coupled with Nepa wahala. Every tree had its own dominator. Football pitch as scanty as ever. Liverpool, Chelsea, Arsenal and Manchester united fans, where are you; is there no premier league this weekend? The church was filled to the mouth; some were standing. Nasfat was more than colourful. Different church programmes flying in the air. Bose demanding for AOC during the last revision. Victor predicting examination questions from his dreams. University clinic filled with patients; examination fever. Lecturers became more aggressive than ever. New faces surfacing on campus. Night classes like a normal 10am lecture. Some were taking advantage of the night classes to engage in sexual immorality. Nescafe turned to Milo; it became more expensive. Some still struggle to attend dinner party while others postponed their birthday parties. Examination supplication filled God’s table; he was tired of these students. Bimbo copying last minute note. Victory judiciously following her food time table; she looked prepared anyway. Timetable palavers, all blames on victor the class representative; everyone wants the timetable adjusted to their satisfaction. Everybody maintained the best of behaviours; Bisola was nice, she needs a textbook from Victor anyway. Long queue awaiting examination clearance, some were not available; the school was neither prepared. The fear of Mrs Aliyu’s question scared the hell out of Lawal. Dr Olaniyi’s unpredictable question almost gave me a heart attack. Every one with their own palaver; examination knocks on the door.
Knock! Knock! Knock! It is time…
Note: Thanks for your time. I do not wish to bore you with very long writings. Please visit my blog at vicpens.blogspot.com to read more. Lets continue tomorrow; its examination ruckus.
© 2015 All right reserved
Victor O. Adedayo
EXAMINATION RUCKUS (CONTD)
Knock! Knock! Knock! It is time. Everyone is seen loitering around the examination hall at exactly 7.30am awaiting the examination papers. Last minute cramming from Ife. Jessica was still without makeup, no high hills, no Brazilian hair, no Canadian finger nails, no Russian lipstick, Marrykay had escaped, she even slept in school; wonders shall never end. At exactly 8am, the paper arrived. Mr. Balogun with a strong frown, distributing answer sheets. Security officials at every angle of the hall. Mr. Paul, the chief security officer making wave with his siren. Prayer session at every corner; I thought it was Redeem’s convention but it wasn’t. Atlas, the question was distributed. The first scream came from Ridwan “Six questions, answer five, question one is compulsory. Ah! Dr Olaniyi!” everyone took turns to shout “gbese re o”. Syntax was more than a course it was a curse. 30 minutes of pin-drop silence; everyone was battling with the compulsory question. Ojo’s giraffic neck was seen poking every script; he was soon sent out. Shukurat trying to copy all she got from her palm; the fear of Mr Balogun is the beginning of wisdom. Mr Paul with a bundle of malpractice form; was photocopy that cheap. Eventually Kunle was caught; he had slipped Chomsky’s textbook and was at the edge of facing Asomu as Mr paul handed him the malpractice form. Titi shouted “eleyi ma n dashe mi ko ni”; it was korede comfortably scanning Titi’s script.
“30minutes more” steamed the atmosphere. Bose was still battling with question one, Hammed’s hand was on his head; he is yet to figure out what to write. Jessica trying to bring out her prepared chokes; what a pity! She brought it right in front of Mr Paul, it is finished. We had less than 20 minutes, the Vice chancellor entered “hello students, how are you” No one cared to give a response. God saved Bisola, her phone almost rang in the presence of the VC. Mr Paul came and collected Victor’s script; the girl behind him had been scanning his script and reproducing it. Mr Paul wrote -20 on his script before leaving; Victor could not hold it, he busted into tears and left the examination hall. “Pencils up, submit” the statement we wished would never come. Dammy kept on writing, Bolanle turned deaf hears to the instruction. Mr Balogun collected the script of those who were ready and left. Bolanle, Ayo and Dammy started running after Mr Balogun, pleading with tears but he refused. Ridwan got slapped; it was steaming hot anyway. Mr balogun entered his car and drove off. Dammy took bike and followed immediately; finally her script was collected. Exam was over; more dramas and reactions after the cut.
RUCKUS OF EXAMINATION (CONTD)
Tolani misinterpreted the question. No one claimed to solve all five questions. James focused attention on question 3 that carried just 2marks. Tayo didn’t read the instruction and left question 1 unanswered. Jide was just coming; he thought the exam was 10-12noon. Phebe kept on crying. Victor was frowning; he felt like killing that girl. Victory left without saying a word. Tosin with his carefree attitude was consoling everyone. Atlas everyone left for their various houses. All I heard from Sunday service was Syntax and Dr Olaniyi; some prayed for him to be blindfolded while marking, while others begged for mercy.
Holiday! Holiday! Holiday! Everyone was on holiday. High expectation of the result. “Is the result out on the portal” was the question that dominated our Whatsapp group. Bisola constantly asking “When is the result going to be released” everyone was clueless anyway. Speculations flying in the air; only one person had “A” in syntax, half of the class carried it over. Receiving a slap is not painful at all; the most painful thing is the anticipation before getting slapped. Departmental meeting to college meeting; College meetings to senate meetings. Result consideration and all the palaver; no one had an idea of when the result would be released. Azeezat kept on calling victor; she was very scared. Some said the result was to be pasted on the notice board; I was scared to the marrow. It was just another rumour.
Finally, at exactly 12:05am on Jan 1st, the result was out officially. The website was flooded; thousands of students trying to check their results. The most annoying part was that the university intentionally wanted to spoil our New Year celebration. I could not concentrate in church that night; I was thinking about the result. Calls were flying, spreading the release of the result. Kemi could not check her result; she sent me her Matric number to check for her. I decided not to check until the next day but I was just giving myself a heart-attack. I could not eat throughout the New Year celebration. Atlas, I summoned up courage to check my result alongside Kemi’s. Syntax was the first I scrolled to; thank God, it was alright. Few days later, the tension had eased on everyone and the atmosphere was back to normal.
First semester holiday was short, we resumed on the first week of January. Jessica was yet to check her result; she begged Tosin to check for her. It was one of the best result from the rear; just 5 Carry overs, 2 Not available (N/A) and 1 D. Tosin said her gp was not sufficient to flash Mtn-Mtn. As Jessica was about to cry, Tosin consoled her; that’s his nature anyway. The new semester began and everyone knew there was need to buckle up.
That was examination in Kwasu. Thanks for your time
By Victor O Adebayo at http://www.vicpen.blogspot.com